I am going to hit on two things in this section. First, we will talk about
maintaining repentance, and second, your Spiritual Self Care Plan. If you
have truly taken all of these steps (if you are still working on them then you
will just have to imagine), look at how far you have come!
Do you remember having areas of your life that you were ashamed about
and hoped nobody would ever discovered? Do you remember feeling stuck,
caught in cycles and patterns? Do you remember feeling steeped in trauma
and unable to function? And not too long ago you discovered all of those weeds
in the your garden of your mind. How is it looking now? Are there fewer weeds?
Are the Truths beginning to sprout and grow? I hope you are beginning to detect
at least some small differences from before our time together.
and hoped nobody would ever discovered? Do you remember feeling stuck,
caught in cycles and patterns? Do you remember feeling steeped in trauma
and unable to function? And not too long ago you discovered all of those weeds
in the your garden of your mind. How is it looking now? Are there fewer weeds?
Are the Truths beginning to sprout and grow? I hope you are beginning to detect
at least some small differences from before our time together.
Now that you have gone to such extensive efforts to muck out your life, you don’t
want to lose any ground. Did you know you can start maintaining at any point?
Even if you are still working to grow your trust or still working through the Inventory
as you read this, or wherever you are working, you don’t have to wait to apologize
when you make a mistake. The rest of the book you start as soon as there are any
changes to maintain. Any time you gain ground, you will now want to spread out
and take care of that fertile ground too.
want to lose any ground. Did you know you can start maintaining at any point?
Even if you are still working to grow your trust or still working through the Inventory
as you read this, or wherever you are working, you don’t have to wait to apologize
when you make a mistake. The rest of the book you start as soon as there are any
changes to maintain. Any time you gain ground, you will now want to spread out
and take care of that fertile ground too.
You know the familiar phrase, “Use it or lose it.” So it is with putting our lives in order.
In this context, here is the best way I can describe it. When something comes to your
attention (either from your past or the present), you take care of it immediately.
In this context, here is the best way I can describe it. When something comes to your
attention (either from your past or the present), you take care of it immediately.
When the Holy Ghost whispers areas of improvement, you start working on it. When
you realize you made a mistake, you apologize. When you sin, you quickly repent.
When you realize it’s possible you may have offended someone, you apologize. That
is what maintenance means to me. You do everything that is necessary to maintain
your repentance, knowing how quickly little things left unattended or ignored can build
up again.
you realize you made a mistake, you apologize. When you sin, you quickly repent.
When you realize it’s possible you may have offended someone, you apologize. That
is what maintenance means to me. You do everything that is necessary to maintain
your repentance, knowing how quickly little things left unattended or ignored can build
up again.
If I want a nice garden, I have to be outside with my hands in the dirt. I have to weed
my garden, water it, fertilize it, and care carefully for the plants I want to grow. The
same is true for our lives. We can’t expect to just toss seeds into the ground, leave
it to itself, and only check back at harvest time. We won’t get the same results as
when we carefully attend to the needs of our garden plot regularly.
my garden, water it, fertilize it, and care carefully for the plants I want to grow. The
same is true for our lives. We can’t expect to just toss seeds into the ground, leave
it to itself, and only check back at harvest time. We won’t get the same results as
when we carefully attend to the needs of our garden plot regularly.
We purchased a home with our first yard three years ago. When we looked at the
house, we had no idea what to watch for. All we knew is there was a yard and everything
looked green, so it passed our inspection. Once we moved into the house and looked at
things up close, however, we quickly realized that things were severely overgrown.
house, we had no idea what to watch for. All we knew is there was a yard and everything
looked green, so it passed our inspection. Once we moved into the house and looked at
things up close, however, we quickly realized that things were severely overgrown.
Many aspects of the yard had not been cared for in years. At one point I was raking
up dead, slimy, moldy leaves that were literally knee deep. I felt so frustrated! I had
inherited a house that I thought I would have cared for differently along the way. As I
continued to rake furiously, a strong impression entered my mind. The maintenance step
is what I was currently working on and God saw this as a perfect teaching moment.
up dead, slimy, moldy leaves that were literally knee deep. I felt so frustrated! I had
inherited a house that I thought I would have cared for differently along the way. As I
continued to rake furiously, a strong impression entered my mind. The maintenance step
is what I was currently working on and God saw this as a perfect teaching moment.
“Katy, this is what your life will be like if you let it go now. After all the attention, effort, and
time we have spent together working on the details, if you were to kick back, this is what
it would be like. It’s easier to maintain it now than let it go. Remember this moment to
refer back to when you are tempted to just sweep things under the rug. Little things quickly
add up to big things.” I stopped and leaned onto my rake for a moment and let this personal
message really sink in.
time we have spent together working on the details, if you were to kick back, this is what
it would be like. It’s easier to maintain it now than let it go. Remember this moment to
refer back to when you are tempted to just sweep things under the rug. Little things quickly
add up to big things.” I stopped and leaned onto my rake for a moment and let this personal
message really sink in.
“And now, my beloved brethren, after ye have gotten into this strait and narrow path,
I would ask if all is done? Behold, I say unto you, Nay; for ye have not come thus far
save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the
merits of him who is mighty to save.
I would ask if all is done? Behold, I say unto you, Nay; for ye have not come thus far
save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the
merits of him who is mighty to save.
“Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect
brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward,
feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father:
Ye shall have eternal life” (2 Nephi 31:19&20, emphasis added).
With consistent time and work on my yard, I can maintain it. But now that same
amount of time isn’t enough as it requires additionally work to get our yard back in shape.
It will take me the next several years before I have this yard at maintenance point, but
even then, there is always the next project.
amount of time isn’t enough as it requires additionally work to get our yard back in shape.
It will take me the next several years before I have this yard at maintenance point, but
even then, there is always the next project.
As I revisit this manuscript one year after originally writing it, I find it ironic that our family
decided there would be no garden this year and that there have been higher priorities
than spending our time maintaining green this summer. There are times and seasons
and as we focus our attention and time on one or certain areas of our lives, it may mean
that other areas aren’t as well maintained at that moment. It’s all about keeping our plates
from dropping like Elder Bednar wisely taught us many chapters ago.
decided there would be no garden this year and that there have been higher priorities
than spending our time maintaining green this summer. There are times and seasons
and as we focus our attention and time on one or certain areas of our lives, it may mean
that other areas aren’t as well maintained at that moment. It’s all about keeping our plates
from dropping like Elder Bednar wisely taught us many chapters ago.
Yet so it is with our lives. We can’t let it go and expect to keep what we have worked so
hard to gain. We must “press forward,” which means we always have something we are
working on in the process of uncovering more lies, planting and nourishing Truths, and
repenting for the rest of our lives. As we “endure to the end,” we maintain what we have
gained and expand on our gains for the rest of our lives.
hard to gain. We must “press forward,” which means we always have something we are
working on in the process of uncovering more lies, planting and nourishing Truths, and
repenting for the rest of our lives. As we “endure to the end,” we maintain what we have
gained and expand on our gains for the rest of our lives.
Some people find it helpful to actually write these things out. At the end of the day or
the beginning of the next day you can take a few minutes to jot down what happened
in your day. You can write anything that needs to be taken care of (an apology or amends,
some unwanted action/behavior to walk back to the belief level, needed repentance, etc.).
the beginning of the next day you can take a few minutes to jot down what happened
in your day. You can write anything that needs to be taken care of (an apology or amends,
some unwanted action/behavior to walk back to the belief level, needed repentance, etc.).
It may work well for you to write out a prayerful plan for the upcoming day as well. As
you "...counsel with the Lord," (Alma 37:37) you decide how best to maintain your gains,
but however you decide to do it, just do it! Fill in this newness so that it stays!
you "...counsel with the Lord," (Alma 37:37) you decide how best to maintain your gains,
but however you decide to do it, just do it! Fill in this newness so that it stays!
My Spiritual Self Care Plan:
You know what to do. What do YOU need personally to be in a good place spiritually?
What does your spirit need in order to be nourished and filled by God and Truth?
Remember, there is not one right answer. Here are a few categories that are important
to me, but you may need something else or in addition to my suggestions.
What does your spirit need in order to be nourished and filled by God and Truth?
Remember, there is not one right answer. Here are a few categories that are important
to me, but you may need something else or in addition to my suggestions.
Remember too that all of the self care plans are living. You may need more from one
area at certain times in your life or you may need something completely different as
you have new life experiences. These are never set in stone! The ultimate goal with
all of your self care plans isn’t for you to have some checklist or rigid ritual routine that
you cling to.
area at certain times in your life or you may need something completely different as
you have new life experiences. These are never set in stone! The ultimate goal with
all of your self care plans isn’t for you to have some checklist or rigid ritual routine that
you cling to.
It’s simply for you to become aware of yourself and what you need physically, mentally,
and spiritually. As you are consistent over time, you will naturally settle into a core routine
of what you need in order to stay in a good place. And ideally, over time, you will learn to
be aware enough of yourself that you get whatever you need for yourself.
and spiritually. As you are consistent over time, you will naturally settle into a core routine
of what you need in order to stay in a good place. And ideally, over time, you will learn to
be aware enough of yourself that you get whatever you need for yourself.
For example, you just innately know that you need to be in the temple today or this week.
Even though you have already said your prayers this morning, you need to pray right now.
Do you see the difference from using these plans as some sick checklist that still doesn’t
help keep us in a good place or fulfill our actual needs?
Even though you have already said your prayers this morning, you need to pray right now.
Do you see the difference from using these plans as some sick checklist that still doesn’t
help keep us in a good place or fulfill our actual needs?
Consider rather than writing, “Read my scriptures,” use it as your chance to tailor to
your needs! What do you need and how can these be measurable and as detailed
as possible?
your needs! What do you need and how can these be measurable and as detailed
as possible?
Prayer:
Scripture Study:
Words of Prophets and Apostles; Other Sources of Truth:
Church Attendance, Preparation, and Participation: (***Partaking of the Sacrament
each week*** If you are unable to do so right now, maybe consider writing down in this
space what you need to do or are doing to be able to have that privilege again.)
each week*** If you are unable to do so right now, maybe consider writing down in this
space what you need to do or are doing to be able to have that privilege again.)
Regular Temple Attendance: (You may not have a current recommend. Maybe in such
cases, you need to have this section be your plan of working to get one. Maybe it’s also
your plan to go to the temple grounds regularly for now. The grounds are open to all, and
like the interior of the temple, are also dedicated places. Maybe it’s your plan to participate
in vital family history work. You decide. Also, “regular” means something different to each
of us---especially for those who are great distances from the closest temple. Don’t forget to
include God, however, in what your “regular” needs to be.)
cases, you need to have this section be your plan of working to get one. Maybe it’s also
your plan to go to the temple grounds regularly for now. The grounds are open to all, and
like the interior of the temple, are also dedicated places. Maybe it’s your plan to participate
in vital family history work. You decide. Also, “regular” means something different to each
of us---especially for those who are great distances from the closest temple. Don’t forget to
include God, however, in what your “regular” needs to be.)
My Callings:
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