Monday, December 1, 2014

Opening My Heart Center...

UPDATE:  And here was the performance.  Oh, there are few things as thrilling as singing with an orchestra!

Speaking of being brave, I mustered my courage and auditioned as a soloist for the community performance of Handel's Messiah a few months ago.  8 years ago I also auditioned for the BYU-Idaho performance.  I remember when auditions had been announced.  I sheepishly mentioned my interest to my husband and spoke disbelief in my ability to perform to that level.  He said something along the lines of

"You miss 100% of the chances you don't take. If you audition, your chance is upped to 50%."

Love that man!  I stewed on it.  The thoughts of being vulnerable and auditioning was terrifying.  In addition to the "normal" fears as a vocal major of squeaking, missing notes, or words, this was the first time I had ever put myself out there like that.  What if I'm not good enough for this caliber of performance?  What if I get the solo, then blow it with the orchestra?  I allowed doubt, fear, and negative what if's to haunt me...almost to the point I would have never even known what I had missed.

Still, somehow I manged to scribble my name into an audition time slot.  As the audition time approached, I was so terrified I almost left the building.  Instead, I found my shaky legs bringing me into the room.  As I began singing, my heart leaped with joy.  This is one of my missions here: to praise His name, and to do it through song.

I don't remember the details of receiving results of the audition; however, I was privileged to be selected and humbled to add my voice with others in rejoicing in the long-anticipated birth of our Savior!

I felt very strongly to audition this year for the community performance of the Messiah.  How I wish I could juggle singing in the choir this year!  The inspired text and music have been healing to my soul in other times and seasons I have been blessed to participate.  I found myself at a similar cross-roads in auditioning for a solo.  I realized that even for the sake of having courage, in and of itself it was worth auditioning and putting myself in a vulnerable position.

I am humbled to announce that I will be singing again this year.  Those interested in tickets may purchase them through the city's website HERE.  There are so many fabulous sopranos that most of us will be sharing the solos.  The performances are Dec 19 & 20.  I will be performing on the 20th only.  $5 per person.  At the Tabernacle.  6 years and up.

Not only has this (and will it) be an opportunity to courageously walk the path of righteousness, but also I realized that He is hearing my prayer: "...Lord, be merciful unto me: heal my soul..." (Psalms 41:4) as we have partnered to heal the trauma.  Singing opens the heart and has always brought healing to me.  It raises the vibration.  There are no words to describe the incredible feeling of being filled with the spirit through music!  Truly I can testify that "O Lord, thou has searched me, and known me.  [He] understandest my thought afar off...and art acquainted with all my ways...Such knowledge is too wonderful for me" (Psalms 139: 1-3, 6)

And if participating in this great work, dressing up like a princess, and singing with orchestral accompaniment were enough, my solo covers the announcement of the Savior's birth to the Shepherds.  I am so blessed!

I am humbled and excited! <3

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