Hold Thy Peace


When it came to getting pregnant, we were always able to "pick our month."  (hopefully that isn't TMI lol)  Although infertility has never been our struggle, we have had a difficult time holding onto pregnancies.  We have lost 7 babies to miscarriage and struggled to convince all 3 of the boys to hold tight. :)  It is not my intention in any way to compare to other people's heartaches.  I hope you can feel my intent to be sensitive to others and their situations.  I am painfully aware of many who are unable to have even one child.

Now that we aren't as green to adoption, we have realized that adoption isn't "the easy route" we thought it was. It's just as, if not more, difficult, but in different ways. We have friends who in hoping to adopt are never able to bring a child home period. ever.  And here we are with FOUR beautiful and healthy children.  People may look at us and wonder why it's such a "big deal."  "You already have four, right?"  Yes.  But for this girl who God blessed with a mother-heart at young age, not being able to freely welcome children into our home has hit tender, tender places in my heart.  Being a mom is what I have always wanted to be more than anything else.  These experiences we have been through, others may have been able to pass through and not even bat an eye.  BUT for us, and me in particular, it has stretched me beyond what I thought was possible.

Although my greatest desire would be to simply be a stay-at-home mom with more children than we have been able to bring into our family, God has had different plans for me and my life. All is well and as it should be! It has taken me a long time to find peace in that and to fully Trust God with this tender place in my heart.

Here I have written what God has taught me about miracles: both the kind where He makes the impossible possible, and the kind where our difficulty is swallowed up in Jesus Christ. In more recent years, we have also discovered a third miracle: God's ability to expand our understanding beyond this life; to look forward to the joys of eternity. I also write about my journey to become a more mindful parent to my precious children.

Although I speak of the big change of plans and losses surrounding the events of bringing children into our home, I hope you will find ways to relate to the patterns and principles I discuss.  It is my greatest hope that you will find Christ and His hope and healing through my words. For I stand as a living witness to the reality of Him and His power.

Mark and I after bringing Leland into our arms together.


May God bless you as you seek to align your will with His---regardless of the kind of miracle He seeks to give you.

~Katy
 

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